Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Meby Lily Collins Published 07 Mar 2017
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In this groundbreaking debut essay collection, featuring never-before-seen photos, actress Lily Collins—star of Mortal Instruments and the upcoming Rules Don’t Apply—is opening a poignant, honest conversation about the things young women struggle with: body image, self-confidence, relationships, family, dating, and so much more.
For the first time ever, Lily shares her life and her own deepest secrets, underlining that every single one of us experiences pain and heartbreak. We all understand what it’s like to live in the light and in the dark. For Lily, it’s about making it through to the other side, where you love what you see in the mirror and where you embrace yourself just as you are. She's learned that all it takes is one person standing up and saying something for everyone else to realize they’re not alone.
By turns hilarious and heartbreaking, Lily’s honest voice will inspire you to be who you are and say what you feel. It’s time to claim your voice! It’s time to live your life unfiltered.
"Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me" Reviews
so. freaking. excited. for. this. book.
I LOVED THIS BOOK. I needed a break from one of the other books I was currently reading and desired something lighter that required less commitment, and Unfiltered was a wonderful choice.
CW: eating disorders, abusive relationships, addiction
I really enjoyed the writing style. Lily Collins is my favorite actress and her voice throughout these essays felt entirely authentic and raw. I believe had I read this book without knowing who the author was, I would have a fair chance determining this was her writing.
My favorite passages of course have to be the stories on food and eating disorders. Lily successfully expresses what it is truly like to suffer from anorexia/bulimia without including descriptions that would be intensely triggering for other survivors. She tells her story in a way that is honest, "unfiltered," and saddening, but still manages to give readers a glimmer of hope that shows that recovery is possible and something to desire. I especially enjoyed learning about her journey with food, from the pain provoked by the eating disorder to her joy of cooking and baking. This truly is an inspirational tale of how overcoming your inner demons is within your reach.
The other passages that really stood out to me were those expressing her love for her parents, her struggle with her insecurities and efforts towards good self esteem, and her experience with toxic and abusive relationships and partners. Each chapter is well placed, fully developed, and successfully gets the author's point across. I feel every word of this book is equally important and something that everyone, especially young girls, should read.
Could not be more pleased with Lily Collin's essay collection. I feel this is a book so many of my followers would enjoy!!
For the first time ever, Lily Collins shares her life and her own deepest secrets, underlining that every single one of us experiences pain and heartbreak. We all understand what it’s like to live in the light and in the dark. For Lily, it’s about making it through to the other side, where you love what you see in the mirror and where you embrace yourself just as you are. She's learned that all it takes is one person standing up and saying something for everyone else to realize they’re not alone.
I don’t tend to follow Collins or her films, but I love reading memoirs and essays, so I decided to give this one a go. And for the most part it did not disappoint. These essays cover a wide range of topics, from art, tattoos and Hollywood to eating disorders (battling with anorexia and bulimia), abusive relationships, self-love and acceptance, the connection and closeness between mother-daughter relationships, the complexity of father-daughter relationships, and a whole lot more.
But the one thing that stood out most about Unfiltered was how Collins laid her cards on the table and didn't hold back in addressing her past and present. I learned a lot about her character through the wisdom she imparted in this book. With quotes such as:
“My mom was the one who finally encouraged me to speak with a very dear friend who had been in this same kind of relationship years before. We sat for a couple of hours and talked about our shared experiences, and at the end he looked at me so powerfully and said: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them.” With that simple statement—originally coined by Maya Angelou—it all clicked.”
“Forgiving myself is just as important as forgiving others.”
“It starts with me. In order to accept the love I deserve from someone else, I must truly believe that I am worthy of it. And I am. And I’ll never let anyone tell me differently.”
I loved the essay on “WE ACCEPT THE LOVE WE THINK WE DESERVE” because I'd just researched that quote last night and found my favorite post that explains it so well.
And then this piece about her mom:
“I remember feeling so guilty as a teenager if I had plans on the weekend because I didn’t want to leave her alone. If I left, what would she do? She never put that pressure on me; it was something I put on myself. I think this dynamic is common in mother-daughter relationships as complex and close as ours. I felt this innate sense of responsibility to protect her from loneliness, much like her instincts to protect me.”
This resonated so strongly with me.
“They are the proof that sharing our stories is key. It doesn’t matter where we’re from, what we look like, how old we are, or who we love—we all deserve to talk and connect. We all deserve to feel part of something greater. Because we are.”
But with all that I loved, the swiftness of this book made it difficult to fully connect with the author. Since a lot felt brushed over and rushed, we didn't fully get to dive into Collins's thoughts and feelings. There were only handful of essays where I actually felt something more, like when she talked about her eating disorders, accepting herself and coming of age. Her intellect, charm, and heart felt finally palpable and there. But then towards the end, it would once again feel so hurried that I'd loose the emotional bond created in that moment. It reminded me a lot of Alexandra Elle's poetry collection, Words from a Wanderer.
However, on a more positive note, I was appreciative of the amount of photographs scattered throughout the book:
Note: I'm an Amazon Affiliate. If you're interested in buying Unfiltered, just click on the image below to go through my link. I'll make a small commission!
This review and more can be found on my blog.
I've never been shy about being silly. Life's just too short for that. It's important to do the things you love, even if other people think they're weird. And who are they to say what's weird anyway? Do THEY set the cool standard? No. Doing what we love is what makes us unique. Goofball, nerd, dork, geek, nutcase, and eccentric are all nicknames I'll wear proudly if it means living each day laughing and smiling and being happy!
This book is poorly written, very boring, and consists mostly of cliches and platitudes.
Collins really has close to nothing to offer here, and she is a terrible writer.
The book is her saying: love yourself, you're beautiful, don't take shit from boys, I love Harry Potter, I love Disneyland, my mom is the best mom, be strong, be yourself. And not in a cool or deep way, either. Just basically saying everything just like that.
Although we as daughters all have personal experiences with our own dads, we can still relate to one another's feelings and frustrations on a broad level. We can help one another come to a deeper understanding and greater appreciation for our father-daughter relationships. Our dads may not always live up to our expectations of what we think they should be or do. We may even find that they aren't capable of giving us what we need. In these moments it's so important to remember that recognizing someone's flaws is a gift. It allows us to take a step back and reevaluate how we approach them and how to move forward. It also spares us the agony and pain of blaming ourselves for their actions. Once we've realized this, it's time to express our thoughts and feelings. We must let them know how much we still need them and how it's never too late to right wrongs or change patterns. It can get better for both of us.
This book put me into a bit of a stupor, it was so boring and pointless. The only parts that were slightly rousing were when Collins discusses her anorexia and her bulimia. Of course, her descriptions of these diseases are on point, and even though she doesn't transform into a good writer when talking about them, I think it is good and right and helpful for a 28-year-old to help other young people who might be suffering about her struggles. Oftentimes as an anorexic you feel very alone, and perhaps reading about Collins' experiences might help some teens to realize that their behavior is not unique and that they have sisters who suffer in similar ways. Luckily Collins got the help she needed and was able to put her anorexia and bulimia in remission, but - as she did an amazing job of pointing out in the book, you are never cured from these EDs. They are always lurking in your subconscious... or in the back of your head, waiting to come out again. She rightfully worries about having to lose weight for a role in which she portrays an anorexic, terrified her ED is going to come out and play again. Luckily, she did it under the supervision of a nutritionist, but if I were her I would have been terrified. If I were her I'd have turned down that role with a loud "Hell, no." But she says she is glad she did it and that the film helped her understand more about herself and her disease.
Even though Collins is 28, she sounds a lot younger in this book. Her 'voice' here sounds like maybe a 19 or 20-year-old. This was weirding me out a little bit. She sounded early college-age, not 'nearing thirty' age. I'm beginning to think this is a celebrity thing, though, as a lot of celebrity memoirs I read by women have a feel that's a lot younger than the author.
Tl;dr - A boring, dull and poorly written book that is nothing more than platitudes and 'you go, girl' sentiments. Really fluffy, meaningless, and with no substance. This isn't due to Collins' age!!!! Many women of similar age have written great memoirs. She simply isn't cut out to be a writer.
I'm hesitant to give this one star - simply for her discussion of anorexia and bulimia. If even one teenager (or older) reads this and gets decides to deal with their illness it will be a complete success of a book in my mind, regardless of the fact that the majority of it is useless, meaningless drivel.
P.S. I don't think I have ever seen a Collins film, I don't know who she is, and I have no interest in her as an actor and I am pretty unfamiliar with her acting. So that didn't affect my review any.
Íntimo, sincero y valiente.
"Be you and embrace your differences as things that make you unique and special. “Different” shouldn’t be considered confusing, negative, or something that divides us. It should be a quality we applaud and admire within ourselves and others."
I love Lily Collins so damn much, even before she started writing this book.
She was such an inspiration for teenagers like me. Long before I started reading books and finding an escape route to the fictional world, I grew up thinking that girls on the cover of Vogue magazines were born perfect, no necessary enhancements required but I know better now.
LJC wrote a lot of her past experiences in this book. Starting from her insecurities, former relationships, addiction, eating disorder, rejections and up to her journey to finding and discovering her self worth. It was refreshing to know that even the great Lily Collins battled the thing that current teenagers are now facing. She made me realize that it doesn't matter how much I eat as long as I'm happy with myself, I should never give a fuck about what others would say.
I noticed Lily's sudden weight loss but it never occurred to me that the reason behind it was because she was not feeling good about herself. I mean, I thought she was perfect and I never wanted to change anything about her but it was clearly not the same for her. I guess we all ruin ourselves for aiming towards perfection. I am so glad that Lily wrote this book, I was on the brink of having an eating disorder, I don't eat as much as I ought to, I feel insecure about myself, I walk the hallways looking down because I thought I wasn't pretty enough. This book saved my life, thank you Lily.
All I could say is that if I love Lily Collins before. Then, I basically worship her now.